Thursday, October 23, 2008
Thoughts I had
I am sitting here while Ryan eats his lunch. He will eat pretty much anything I put in front of him. He loves all food. He can have just finished eating lunch or dinner and if you start to eat anything he will come begging for some. He is so funny. Shannon asked me why it is we never get tired of looking at the boys cute faces. I said I don't know. I wonder if we as parents will ever get tired of it. I don't think so. When I look at them I am amazed that God let me have them to raise. What was he thinking. :-) No really, I adore both of my boys and am so thankful everyday for the blessing of these very precious boys. They have brought so much to my life. They filled something that was missing. I can't even begin to imagine my life with out them.
Today has me thinking alot of the things and people God puts into our lives. Why would he put someone in my life that will not let me be a part of that life. They always have to be right and will not take responsibility for anything that they may have said or done. They will not apologize for hurtful things they have accused me of. I don't understand. I have been trying to make this relationship work for so many years and I know God has wanted me to. But I have to ask, "how long and how much does God expect me to have to put up with. It brings to mind the scripture in Matthew chapter 18 vs 21-22. Peter asks Jesus, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, " I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times."
So now what, I have done that. Am I to just move on and let them know I will be there if they need me? I have been asking God to give me peace with the right answer. I think I am not to engage with anymore back and forth with this person but to let them know I will be here and I love them. What more can I do?
So that brings me to the end of my rambling thoughts. I am doing laundry so I can get ready for my MOPS steering retreat in Leavenworth. I am looking forward to it. I am excited to see what God has in store for me this weekend. The new friendships I will make and the ones he will strengthen. Now lets hope Shannon can handle both boys by himself!